My 6 rules for a great relationship

Over a year has passed since I began dating the greatest girl in the world. I have been the happiest guy ever during that timeframe, and so the other day I was thinking of what makes me and her so happy together and also what allows us to really click and make it through all the ups and downs. I have compiled a list of what I believe are some of the most important tips to remember if you want to have a successful, fun, and just all-around awesome relationship:

1. BE HONEST. Some people take this one for granted, but it truly is the bedrock, the foundation, of every good relationship. You cannot build a relationship on lies, because it will come back to haunt you. Plus, what kind of relationship really exists between the two of you if you are never honest with each other? The more openly honest you are with your significant other, the more relaxed and fun your relationship will be.

2. TRUST THEM. This one is so very important, but again gets overlooked or taken for granted in relationships. I cannot tell you how many couples I've seen that spend entire days and WEEKS fighting over what each other was doing on a particular night, who they went out with, who they were talking to, what they talked about, why they were hanging out with those particular people, etc, etc, etc, ETC. It is almost impossible to describe to you how much easier your relationship becomes when you have full trust in your significant other. And that all starts with finding the person who is right for you. Once you do that, the trust factor will naturally reveal itself. My girlfriend has tons of guy friends. I like to go out with my buddies and have a few drinks on the weekends. We don't let that get in the way of what truly matters, which is how much we care about each other.

3. SINCERELY CARE ABOUT WHO YOU'RE WITH: Some relationships(actually alot) are built solely on physically attractiveness or one-night stands that became long-term. Relationships built on sex and physical appearance never last because after awhile you start looking for something more out of your significant other, and then you realize that your feelings were not genuine but only superficial. It is so important to truly care about who you are with. Anything less than that is not a relationship; it is just feeding your primal instincts, which someone who truly cares about you would not appreciate in the first place. If you find someone who you are passionate about, it will naturally allow your relationship to be more fun and laid-back.

4. HAVE FUN! Have you ever run into that couple that really kinda keeps to themselves? They don't go out much, don't have alot of friends, and really never experience what life has to offer. Sure, these relationships may last, but have you ever seen either of them smile? Chances are you haven't. If you are just going through the motions in a relationship because you have fear of change, they it's not worth your time or energy. Go do stuff together! It could be mini-golfing, water-skiing, or just playing a board game or having a dinner with friends. It doesn't matter what it is as long as you are together and having fun doing it. You can't find something unique and different to do 365 days a year(or maybe you can!), but make your relationship interesting! This will relieve the tension between the two of you and in your own individual lives. Couples who have fun are happier, and this will trickle down to every facet in your relationship.

5. YOUR RELATIONSHIP WILL NOT BE PERFECT. Even I am guilty of this one. I consider our relationship to be very unique in the sense that we don't get in arguments or fights; we have nothing to fight about. But to believe that your relationship will never have any speed bumps or brick walls is the ultimate form of nieveity. Just because you care deeply about each other does not mean that you will agree with each other's decisions or beliefs 100 percent of the time; it just doesn't happen. No couple is completely symmetrical; if they were, life would be boring. Slight differences allows you to keep an open mind and allow room for adjustment in your relationship. There will be fights, there will be disagreements, but if you have a solid foundation and truly care about each other you will work it out and help each other through the rough spots. Don't lose sleep over small tiffs or disagreements, they are going to happen. The important thing is that you are able to overcome the small stuff and rectify the situation for the better of the relationship. Passion sees through all, even differences between the two of you.

6. HAVE YOUR OWN LIFE! GET AWAY FROM EACH OTHER! This final piece of advice seems completely counter-intuitive to what I am trying to get across in this post. However, I must say this is one of the most important pieces of advice I could give to you. My girlfriend is a HUGE part of my life; I think about her constantly, and in fact I wish she was here with me right now because I miss her alot, but that does not mean she is my ENTIRE life. In order to have a healthy, successful, and fun relationship, you have to be able to be apart from each other at times and do other things. Spend time with your friends, join clubs and organizations, take up hobbies, participate in local events or volunteer in the community. Successful relationships are all about BALANCE. If you spend all your time together with each other, you end up fighting or becoming bored or just not appreciating each other as much as you should. I truly believe that because me and my girlfriend both are mature and responsible people who care deeply about each other but also are able to balance it out with other things, that we are able to have a relationship that is above and beyond what either of us thought possible just a year ago. So, go ahead and schedule time with your friends, or just time with yourself to read or something. A little time apart will go a long way to bringing you closer together.

So, those are my tips for a long, successful relationship. They are by no means exhaustive, but I beleive they provide a good foundation for our future together. This is what works for us, but you may have your own tips and beliefs on the subject. I wake up every day and ask myself what I can improve on to make our relationship better; chances are, these tips are never far from my mind when I do.